Mitch “El Wrangle Low” McConnell and Don I’ll Tell All
(Aka Putin’s Ninja Turtles)
Down deep in the sewers there skulks
Strange mutants that think they are hulks
But though they are furtive
They always feel hurt if
Light shines upon their massive bulks
Despite having an outer shell
It does not hold up very well
When exposed to the weight
Of a questions they hate
Like “are there truths that you can tell?”
So they work out for hours and hours
To exercise their super powers
Of always being relaxed
About things Putin’s hacked
(Or infernos or meetings in towers)
Now McConnell’s not handsome like Shrek
Though he has an incredible neck
That we’d all like to wring
To hear this turtle sing
While Don “I’ll Tell All” sanctions a wreck